13th Short - [Voice/Written/Action]

[kingofwaste]

[Voice]

Alright folks, it’s that time again! Oswald the Lucky Rabbit here, reportin’ to you live with the new partner list for Project Hydra Social! And for all you New Feathers out there, Hydra Social is a penpal initiative started by the S.O.S. Brigade. You write a letter to your partner and in no time, that partner will be a pal! Simple as that. I added some new folks and changed everything up a bit, but participants are picked at random so everyone be sure to check the list!


[The following has been scribbled down in an untidy, but still readable handwriting. Usernames are not actually included in the list, of course.]

Walter Delques (blackteriques) + Utena Tenjou (revolutionarygirl)
Leon (fellpool) + Ayumu (sundead)
Yotsuba Koiwai (rollypolyclover) + James Norrington (abidinglaw)
Yukio Okumura (sharpness) + Dist the Runny (its_rose_damnit)
Kotarou Inugami (dontforget) + Ling Yao (avaricious)
Fuuko Ibuki (starfishlovesyou) + Pao-lin (i_am_not_cute)
Yuriko Omega (areyoumyfriend) + Yoh Asakura (mikanphones)
Asbel Lhant (drawnbythesword) + Rudy Roughnight (ofwesternwinds)
Roku (flameoroku) + Hiccup (dragoneer)
Kazuma Kval (moezama) + Gracia Hughes (contentedly)
Yui (bigsiskonagi) + Gilbert Nightray (chainedraven)
Orphen (trollkiller) + Caius Qualls (accepted)
Claude C. Kenny (mirrorblade) + Ami Mizuno (geniustheveil)
Precis F. Neumann (rocketpunch) + Isamu (musubi)
Cecilia (teardropshaman) + Frey Falenas (falenandawn)
Scully (poorqueequeg) + Raven (crisisrain)
Reimu Hakurei (illusionarymoon) + Tear Grants (seleniahymn)
Kratos Aurion (shiningbinds) + Aang (savedtheworld)
Jeb Parmalee (sketchingideals) + Leonardo (fearless_leader)
Kain Highwind (dragoon_pride) + Atsuro Kihara (ctrlaltdemons)
Vincent Valentine (thenightmarebegins) + Vivi Nefertari (alabastajewel)
Jay The Unseen (unseenspy) + Usagi Tsukino (lunas)
Saleh (mountain_sage) + Molly Carpenter (talentsgirl)
Asch the Bloody (dissonates) + Grune (lostinmyway)
Edward Elric (automailed) + Emil (snowwhiteproject)
Winry Rockbell (installing) + Luke (hisapprentice)
Shiemi Moriyama (shamelessness) + Kyon (menial)
Haruhi Suzumiya (godbent) + Marceline (the Vampire Queen) (donteatmyfries)
Elicia Hughes (asobouyo) + Japan (miniaturization)
Sayo (memoryboxes) + Minato Arisato (emp3thy)
Rin Okumura (rashness) + Vincent Nightray (keepitinthefamily)
Henry Wellard (bravelad) + Leonhardt (eyesofstrength)
Keiichi Maebara (breaks_destiny) + Sokka (markofthewise)
Phoenix Ikki (uccellodifuoco) + Greg Bleakman (vor)
Anise Tatlin (failguardian) + Beast (tailasoldastime)
Amelia (thedicearecast) + Robert Hastings (semper_cogitans)
Aoba Kuronuma (penetrated) + Selphie Tilmitt (selphie_t)
Yuan (fortunefail) + Kaname Tanuma (kindaqueer)
Dhaos (whatdeheckisthat) + Nagisa Furukawa (cherishedmiracle)
Helios (folklorist) + Prince Reyson (heartofahawk)
Yun (tolivefortoday) + Silver (tsunsandsteals)
Hayate Ayasaki (whimsicalwinds) + Hartia (notshrimpman)


I’ll bet everyone who ain’t on this list is gonna be jealous of you guys, but don’t worry! I also accept sign-ups, so if you’re itchin’ to join in, just let me know and I’ll make it happen.


[Written / Filtered to certain characters]

[Very shortly afterwards, several residents will receive a private note in their journals. It’s clearly directed to them and no other characters can see it, but the message will read the same for everyone.]

Dear Hydra Social participant,

It has come to my attention that you have not gotten in touch with your penpal yet. Either that, or you haven’t been convincing enough to get your pal to return your letters. This is your first warning. Kindly get to that as soon as possible, or there will be consequences. I am not bluffing. Don’t think I won’t hunt you down, because I will. You’ll never see me coming, either. You won’t know I’m hassling you until it’s too late. Besides, you are hurting your pal’s feelings. Shame on you.

Kind regards,
Oswald the Lucky Rabbit.
Unofficial Second Senior Undersecretary of the S.O.S. Brigade.
Most Famous Cartoon Rabbit.

[The characters who received this message are: Sheimi, Winry, Isamu, Sokka, Saleh, Ami, Gilbert, Keiichi, Leonhardt, Caius, and the Beast.]


[Action]

[Characters who enter the grocery store may notice something peculiar over the next few days. That is, a pair of black rabbit ears is sticking out of a barrel filled with apples.

Oswald has begun his crusade to hunt down the repeat offenders and hassle them until they cave. He had the brilliant notion that even socially awkward shut-ins need to visit the store for food, so that’s where he’s waiting. With this perfect hiding place, they won’t see him until it’s too late.

The residents he’s waiting for are Vincent Valentine, Kazuma Kval and Jay the Unseen, but anyone else is free to catch him there too.]

Comments

[voice]

[rashness]

So I'm with someone else? [He thought he was with Ikki, but he's with... some other guy now. Blink. so they mixed them up!! Or something?]

[voice]

[kingofwaste]

Yup! Like I said, I changed everything up a bit. But don't let that stop you from contacting your old partner! This project's all about makin' friends.

[Voice]

[installing]

Hey! He was the one who refused to contact me.

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

It's all about determination. Just keep hasslin' your partner 'till they talk to you.

[Voice]

[savedtheworld]

Kratos? I feel like I've heard that name somewhere before. I wonder what he's like. My other penpal was really nice, too!

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

Kratos is a pretty big mystery from what I can tell, so it's up to you to find out what he's like. I'm countin' on you!

[Action]

[unseenspy]

[Jay has himself a nice little shopping cart and is picking out his favorite foods to restock his shelves. He goes to pack himself some produce as well, but his ninja senses detect something strange in the crate of apples. The ears sticking out only confirm this.]

What the...?

[Action]

[kingofwaste]

[The ears perk up at the sound of that voice. Oswald can see Jay through a tiny crack in the wood. This is it! He hops out of the barrel, sending apples flying all over the place.]

Ahah! I've got you now, Mr. Unseen!

[Voice]

[mountain_sage]

[Saleh sees that warning and is honestly quite confused.]

...What?

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

[Oh look, one of his warned people- ... warnees(?) responded.]

What, what?

[ voice ]

[lunas]

H-.. huh, wait a moment.. did we just switch partners?

[ she's a little slow, give her a few moments. ]

[ voice ]

[kingofwaste]

Yup, ya sure did! And now you'll have two pals, get it?

[voice]

[fearless_leader]

[Wait, what?]

Why am I on the list? I never signed up for this.

[voice]

[kingofwaste]

The people who need this most are the people who wouldn't sign themselves up. Now, I ain't saying that's the same in your case, I'm just saying people need a shove in the right direction, sometimes.

[Action]

[thenightmarebegins]

[Vincent heads into the shop, just going about business as normal. Fortunately the experiment is over, and it'll be a while before the danger of a new one emerges, so... this is the best time to restock groceries.]

[Hm... produce section first... he makes his way over, taking a couple of vegetables, before turning to look at the fruits. That's when he notices the apples. This is strange...]

[Action]

[kingofwaste]

[Oswald continues to lie in wait, peering through a crack in the wood until Vincent is close. Just a little more... Almost there... Now!

He jumps up, scattering apples all over the place as he does so.]

Gotcha! Now face the wrath of Oswald the Lucky Rabbit!

[Written]

[dragoon_pride]

But... I already contacted the other person you assigned to me...

[Written]

[kingofwaste]

Yeah, and now you're getting a new person to contact! The more friends you make, the better.

[lostinmyway]

[Grune looks at the announcement with actual mixed feelings. It will be fun to write to Asch--already she can think of lots of nice things to say--but....]

Isn't Ayumu my partner anymore?

[kingofwaste]

Nope, but that don't mean you need to stop writing to him. It's all about making new friends and keeping them, so if you and Ayumu hit it off, stay in touch with him anyway.

[Written/Filtered to Oswald]

[eyesofstrength]

You may as well remove me from this because I will no longer humor it. I have no interest in making friends

[Written/Filtered to Oswald]

[kingofwaste]

[Scribbly handwriting is scribbly.]

What's that supposed to mean? Everyone needs friends!!! [Yes, those were three exclamation marks.]

[Action] I will be very slow, but I'll tag back when I can |D

[moezama]

[Oswald would be right to think the offenders would still show up at the grocery store. Kazuma was heading for the dairy products when something in the fruit and vegetable aisle stops him.

What...what are those popping out from the apple barrel? Ears?]

[Action]

[kingofwaste]

[Nothing happens for the longest time. Though, if Kazuma listens closely, he'll hear muffled snoring coming from the barrel. The ears slowly sway back and forth with the rhythm.

... Yup, Oswald fell asleep in there.]

[Action] | Couldn't resist.

[talontrot]

[Kazooie's dropping by the grocery shop today mostly for the sake of grabbing a few bags of already-hulled sunflower seeds. (It's a lot harder for her to shell them when she's missing most of her wings...)

But the completely conspicuous pair of ears sticking out of the barrel...]

They're sellin' some pretty ugly-looking apples nowadays.

[Action]

[kingofwaste]

[The ears twitch and a muffled little growl can be heard from inside the barrel, but aside from that, nothing happens. Oswald is determined to stay into hiding until one of his targets appears. Must not flip out, must not flip out...]

[voice]

[ofwesternwinds]

[Yep, guess who didn't expect to see his name on there. Much less on the journal of someone he's sure he's never met!]

I'm on this list too?

[voice]

[kingofwaste]

Uh... [Hold on while he doublechecks.]

Yup! You sure are!

[voice]

[poorqueequeg]

Wait, how did I end up on this list? I don't even think we've met.

[voice]

[kingofwaste]

Like I said, I pick people at random. Just because we've never met doesn't mean I can't find out your name somehow.

[He has no idea how creepy that sounds. Really, he doesn't.]

[drawnbythesword]

[That's... his name on the list? Waaaaiiit a minute...]

Why's my name on there?

forgive this threadjack!

[selphie_t]

You've been picked for a penpal.

[Voice]

[selphie_t]

A new pen pal, huh? Sounds great to me. Thanks for doing this Oswald!

[She'll draw in a bunny version of herself with a happy face. It's not the best portrayal in the world, but it should get the point across.]

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

[Oooh, someone is thanking him for his hard work! About time. And there's a drawing of a bunny, too.]

Hahaha, you're welcome! ...Nice sketch!

[Voice]

[uccellodifuoco]

I don't need a new partner.

[He didn't even need the one he had! But really, he's refusing the change.]

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

Of course ya do! A new partner means a new pal!

[voice]

[fellpool]

[He had managed to not see Oswald's list beforehand, so he has to voice his confusion.]

...Wait. Penpals with Ayumu? What's that about, Oswald?

[voice]

[kingofwaste]

You two can set the right example for everyone else! Show 'm how it's done, like true members of the S.O.S. Brigade.

[Voice]

[tailasoldastime]

[He gets your note, Oswald... and upon receiving it he goes back through his journal to see when he and Usagi last wrote to one another. But before he comes across the most recent letter, he instead finds Oswald's new list. Oh... oh you did not, Oswald, you did not.

Screw this, he's giving you a voice message.] Why am I with someone else now, this A... A-neese person?! I thought my partner was Usagi!

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

[Oh. Oh, he sounds mad. That can't be good.]

It's uh... Well, see, the point is to make more friends, so sticking to just one penpal won't cut it. So... So now you can write to Anise and get to know her! But ya can still write to Usagi too, because you're pals now, right?

[Voice]

[herroyalsunrise]

A pen pal plan? What a wonderful idea. I would love to join in.

[Voice]

[kingofwaste]

Yeah? That's great! What's your name?

[ voice SHE WAS TOLD TO COME HERE OKAY ]

[breezing]

[ As per Keiichi, Ikki came to drop a line. ]

Hiii! I'm Ikki, and I'd like to join your pen pal game, please.

[ voice ]

[kingofwaste]

Wh- This ain't a game, kid. But, sure. What's your name?